Reconsider everything

The start of August is reconsideration time. Am I in the right place? Am I working in the right place. Am I really living the life I want to? These questions are coming back to me around this time every year. After a couple of vacation weeks in the countryside I always feel energized, full of creativity and happy. I spend all days with my wife and kids and we are doing fun stuff together and there is also time for doing fun stuff alone. I never feel bored or stressed out. This is the benefits of being off work but when I daydream about leaving our apartement in Stockholm for good and buy a house out here, I tend to ”forget” about the non-working part of it all. If we did move nothing would be like it is right now. Going to and from work would take much longer for example. In Stockholm I ride my bike for 15 minutes, out here I would probably have to drive for at least 30 minutes. And the kids couldn’t walk home for themselves after school. There would be no close neighbours, no street lights and no open late-shops in the area. And it’s not easy to find a job as a journalist out here. I would have to find something else probably.

Still, I keep daydreaming. I’ll do it for another week. Then I’m back in Stockholm at my job, the kids are back in school and everything will feel just fine again. I guess that also is a part of what we in Sweden call ekorrhjulet, the treadmill of life.